THE THOUGHTS OF UNCLE AL, III

  1. Good, cheap, quick. Pick two.
  2. Complexity is easy; simplicity is difficult.
  3. Something well-organized is not necessarily trustworthy.
  4. Mechanical engineers build weapons; civil engineers build targets.
  5. Thermodynamics proposes, kinetics disposes.
  6. MBA management: If they were any greener they would be plant life.
  7. Fight floccinaucinihilpillification
  8. When hiding needles, it's always good to make the haystack as big as possible.
  9. To be or not to be... are the roots of 4b^2=0.
  10. Knowledge is the only instrument of production that is not subject to diminishing returns.
  11. It is always the most important leg of a three-legged stool that is missing.
  12. It's not what we don't know that hurts, it's what we know that isn't so.
  13. Sometimes we are the windshield, sometimes we are the bug.
  14. Beware those who can compress the most words into the smallest ideas.
  15. Think of all the coincidences that don't happen.
  16. Leave out the parts people skip.
  17. Things are not what they seem - they are what they are.
  18. A belief is not true just because it is useful.
  19. It is always hard when reality intrudes on belief.
  20. Knowledge is power, power is victory!
  21. You need not be cleverer than other people, just be one day earlier.
  22. Don't edit reality for the sake of simplicity.
  23. In theory, there is no difference between theory and practice, but in practice there is.
  24. Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from a rigged demo.
  25. Without authorship and literacy, all moments are lost in time like tears in rain,
  26. Memoranda are written not to inform the reader but to protect the writer.
  27. There is never a morning when it doesn't seem worth gnawing through the leather straps.
  28. To criticize is to volunteer.
  29. Pick good people and stay out of their way.
  30. If you are lonely when you are alone, then you are in bad company.
  31. Poor is the man whose happiness depends on others' approval.
  32. Always remember that you are unique, just like everyone else.
  33. If you knew what you were doing you'd probably be bored.
  34. Mediocrity finds safety in standardization.
  35. A real man makes things happen. A real woman makes them worth happening.
  36. Diplomacy is to say and do the nastiest things in the nicest way.
  37. A truly moral life requires sustained bad luck.
  38. Money is the root of all good.
  39. Societies that create wealth get rich and dramatically increase their scale of achievement, whereas societies that redistribute wealth discourage people from creating it.
  40. Capitalism is the unequal distribution of wealth. Socialism is the unequal distribution of poverty.
  41. There is a point at which patience ceases to be a virtue.
  42. No great cause has ever been won under the banner of Moderation.
  43. The rights of the indolent are the prey of the productive.
  44. Never attribute to malice that which may be explained by stupidity.
  45. Never offend people with style when you can offend them with substance.
  46. Censorship, like charity, should begin at home. Unlike charity, it should end there.
  47. It may be that your whole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others.
  48. When a vendor demands payment in full in advance, a customer demands delivery in full on time.
  49. Furious activity is no substitute for understanding.
  50. Better latent than never.
  51. Unix is user friendly, but it's not promiscuous about whom it gets friendly with.
  52. Two rules to success in life:
    1. Don't tell people everything you know.
  53. Socialism believes in turning workers against owners. Capitalism believes in turning workers into owners.

    First they came for the hackers, but I never did anything illegal with my computer,
      so I didn't speak up.
    Then they came for the pornographers, but I thought there was too much smut on the Internet anyway,
      so I didn't speak up.
    Then they came for the anonymous remailers, but a lot of nasty stuff gets sent from anon.penet.fi,
      so I didn't speak up.
    Then they came for the encryption users, but I could never figure out how to work PGP anyway,
      so I didn't speak up.
    Then they came for me, and by that time
      there was no one left to speak up.

  54. A government that is big enough to give you all you want is big enough to take it all away. War is peace. Freedom is slavery. Ignorance is strength. Bush is President.
  55. If you were a speed reader, you would have already finished reading this.


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